The Price of Love

I have found that often, when I come across something and put it aside, it sometimes turns up just when I need it. Is this a coincidence or does the unconscious know that it is there and go for it at just the right time? Last night I came across this quote by an unknown author, that I had copied down on a 3 x 5 card, and I have no idea how long or since when it has been sitting on my desk. It is as follows: “Grief never ends…But it is a passage, not a place to stay. Grief is not a sign of weakness, nor a lack of faith. It is the price of love.” And in thinking about this, there is no price too great to pay for genuine love. All the poets and the song writers who have tried to capture the essence of love have come close, but alas, no cigar. Love is not something one can describe, it is something that one can only feel. If you are a parent, do you remember the way you felt while you were waiting for your child to be born? You thought you knew what love was then, right? And then came the moment when you first laid eyes on this child of your heart, and you may have realized that you never really knew the meaning of the word love. It’s like a switch that is thrown, and only after that do you know what you have been missing. Being human, we all must experience loss, and in the process, grief as well. But the advice that grief is a passage, and not a place to stay is sage indeed. We never stop missing those we have loved, whether it is a grandparent, a partner, or a pet. It doesn’t go away, it only changes. And it is right that it should change. Are we not lucky, that even with the grief and the pain of loss, there comes a time when there is again enough room in our hearts for new love to blossom? It is never the same, it is different in one way or another, and we may call the new love by a similar name-- partner, friend—but as surely as we are human, with dozens of people inside of us, we will find new and sparkling ways to love the new people and pets in our lives when we are ready. So today, on the first day of this New Year, that I begin with so much hope, I will count my many blessings, and I will take the time to feel true gratitude for those I have loved and lost, and for all of the delicious and wonderful ways they added something to this world of ours. I would not be the person that I have become without them, and though there is still much I want to do and learn and be, those I have loved have given me the start, and I live with appreciation every day that I have had them in my life, and whatever pain I have experienced at their passing, is nothing in comparison to the gifts of the love I have experienced and well worth the price.