The Lights of Christmas

I am set to speak to a group this week about my favorite subject, Appreciative Living. This is a way to have more Joy in you life by looking for the positive in the things that are already part of you life, and by asking yourself, when you are at a loss as to why you are not joyous, “what do I want more of?” If you’ve lived beyond childhood, then you know that it isn’t “things” that bring joy, it the experiences you share with loved ones, the discovery of new ideas and the making of new friends. Both good and bad, uplifting and depressing, exist in all the experiences we have, and it is up to us to find the good and uplifting in what we do. For those of us who have lost a parent, or both parents, you know that the pain of loss changes over time. For me that acute sense of loss is the worst at Passover, partly because both of my parents died at that time of the year, and partly because the table seems so empty without them. But at this time of the year, my daughters and I shift into a different gear. My mom was absolutely fascinated by the lights of Christmas. We were often lucky enough to be included in the Christmas celebrations of our Christian friends, and Mom, who had a great sense of fun and looked for good times wherever they could be found, was thrilled to join them in their celebrations. But the outdoor displays of Christmas lights were her absolute favorite. As they got older, I used to drive my parents around the neighborhood every year, and watch my mother’s excited shiny face as she fogged up the car window with her “Oohs and Ahhs” over the Christmas excesses of Westlake Village. Since my parents have passed away, every year my daughters and I select a night close to Christmas, when everyone who is going to put up lights has already done so, and take the Regina Amira Memorial Christmas Lights Tour, and indulge in an orgy of happy remembrance of Nona’s smiles and laughter as she enjoyed the magic of Christmas. No one who celebrates Christmas could be more thrilled and appreciative of the glow of Christmas displays, than my very Jewish Mother. We miss you, Mom and Dad.